Almost every mom or dad I know has one goal, to get their baby to sleep through the night. And at one time I did too. When Johannes was little, this was my goal. I couldn’t wait for him to sleep through the night so I could rest.
But things are different now. Being a mom of a four year old taught me just how fast time passes.
With Magnus I’m not in a hurry to have him sleep without interruptions. At night he wakes up and wants to nurse. I hear him cry, I rub my eyes awake, pull up my hair, and tiptoe down the hall to his room. I pick him up and sit down in the old chair in his room. He nurses quietly but quickly. When he’s done, he pulls off, lays his head down on the nursing pillow and snuggles into me. I let him stay like this a few minutes before giving his little cheeks kisses and putting him back in his crib. They are fleeting moments these night nursings.
Tonight when Magnus cried out for me earlier than usual I thought about him sleeping through the night, and though the sleep would be nice after all, I have a choice to make. And I choose to get up every night, sleepy and only half awake. Make my way down the hall to his tiny room and cuddle him like he needs to be cuddled. There are worst things in life than being wanted by your kids.