Take Me to the Farm Mom

IMG_4432 IMG_4425 IMG_4346 IMG_4349 IMG_4396 IMG_4424 IMG_4305 IMG_4448 IMG_4446

I couldn’t help myself, I wanted a pumpkin patch photo of Johannes and Magnus, but what I got was so much more than that!  Friday morning Johannes and I had dentist appointments, so when he asked me for the 200th time to take him back to “the farm” I figured, why not.  So my friend Nicole and I planned it out and took our boys to Springridge Farm in Milton.  Close to the dentist, and close to my mom and dad’s for nap time.  The boys ran and played.  There was a lot of giggling, screaming and sweaty hair.  I got exactly 20 photos of the kids in the pumpkin patch and each photograph includes one or both of them either tossing pumpkins down the hill, or rolling on top of the pumpkins.  They’re so silly.  And well, Magnus just slept in the fresh air while my grandmother pushed him around.  So in the end there was no pumpkin patch photo, no staged shot for the family album…but I hope that maybe the boys got a morning full of awesome memories, and some fun pictures to remember it by.

Oh and to clarify, Johannes is covering his ears because he is TERRIFIED of the chickens, not the sound.  He covers his ears when something is terrifying.  Go figure!

Breastfeeding with a Toddler

nursing with a toddler around black and white nursery design nursing with a toddler around black and white nursery design STUVA system ideas nursing with a toddler around

I never intended to breastfeed Johannes.  I didn’t think it was for me.  I realize this is a controversial topic, although I will never really understand why.  I feel breastfeeding, or not breastfeeding for that matter, is a personal and completely individual choice.  And its not a choice that make someone a bad mom or a good mom, or has any sort of defining quality…but this post really isn’t meant to address that opinion.

I didn’t intend to breastfeed Johannes, but then I tried it, and it worked for us…and to my surprise I really enjoyed it.  It wasn’t easy by any means.  I dealt with the same issues most breastfeeding moms deal with, cracked nipples, mastitis, blocked ducts, fear of running low on milk and on and on it goes.  But 90% of the time breastfeeding Johannes was enjoyable and a special time I got with my son.  So for me there was no question that when Magnus was born I wanted to breastfeed him too.

The challenges the second time around breastfeeding were similar to my first experience, except now I also had to feed Magnus with Johannes around.  I tried various strategies to keep Johannes busy during these times, iPad, books, toys.  But what I found was that Johannes wanted to sit with us during feeds.  At first he had a lot of questions, which I answered truthfully and honestly.  Like where milk came from,

“mom did you drink all the milk in the fridge and are now feeding it to Magnus?” he asked.  I couldn’t help but laugh at that one.  Or the ever present,

“mom I’m really thirsty now, can you please get me a glass of milk too?”.

But now that the questions have been asked and answered, Johannes is content sitting on the bench in Magnus’ room, or playing on the floor while I nurse.

I had to explain to him that his brother needs quiet time to eat, so he is generally respectful of this, although he needs reminding from time to time.  And when he gets bored he leaves and goes to play in his room.  And I’ve come to realize that I enjoy this special time with both my boys.  I still get alone time to feed Magnus during the day and night time, but the morning times are for all of us together.  I know its just a matter of time before Johannes won’t want to participate in the feedings, or maybe he will be embarrassed by it, but for now he’s innocent and open minded and I’m hoping to keep it that way.


he smiles!

IMG_4136 IMG_4130 IMG_4115 IMG_4125 IMG_4120

He smiles and coos, and smiles and coos.  Little Magnus found his voice and he loves to smile.  I forgot how heart-melting it is to see that first real smile, not just the gas-induced ones.  At first Magnus would only smile for me, and secretly I might add.  Each time I tried to snap a photograph he would stop.  They were elusive, those little smirks of his.  But a few weeks passed and now he smiles at pretty much anyone.  I love his pure joy.  Pure, no strings attached, innocent joy.  I can’t get enough.  Do you remember those first few smiles from your little humans?

Oh and chunky bellies…ahhhhh don’t even get me started on how much I love them!  Babies are the best aren’t they?!

Mom Uniform


on me: zara cape and scarf, joe fresh hat, lululemon leggings, splendid tshirt, ck chambray shirt, joie sneakers

on johannes: zara jacket, joe fresh jeans, gap hat and sweatshirt (not visible), toms shoes
IMG_4581 IMG_4608 IMG_4580 IMG_4592

I’m not exactly in tip top shape these days.  Actually I’m not in any shape as you can imagine.  Six weeks post-baby Magnus and the doctor  just gave me the go ahead to start working out again.  But until then its all about the comfy leggings, big sweaters, and accessories.

My plan for losing the baby weight is to start running again, with the goal of running the half marathon in the spring.  I’ll also take a “where I am now” picture as motivation.  I did this once before and I can do it again, right??

The Giant Spider

IMG_4210 IMG_4222 IMG_4233 IMG_4271 IMG_4263

The giant spider is out again.  Michael wanted to do it bigger and better this year, meaning more webs, rats, mini spiders and even a fog machine.  Johannes and Michael did all the decorating, and Magnus and I just showed up for the finale.  It was quite the exciting event.  I think above all else I love how excited Johannes gets about holidays now.  Thanksgiving dinner parties, Halloween decorations, and lets not forget Christmas just around the corner!

Doing It Differently

doing-things-differently-with-second-baby squishy-newborn-face raising-a-toddler-and-newborn newborn-photography-toronto IMG_4172

When Johannes was born I read all the parenting books, watched all the parenting videos, researched baby products and read all the consumer reports there were.  I was inexperienced and naive.  I assumed that babies could be raise by clear cut rules.  That we could fix sleep problems by reading someone’s theory or step by step guide.  And through trial and error and day by day we figured it all out anyways.  We figured out what worked for us and what didn’t and most definitely made mistakes along the way.  I say “we” because I certainly did not raise Johannes on my own, but 99% of the “research” was all me.  There were tough times and easy times but we worked it out and somewhere along the way the hard times were forgotten, and all that remains is the positive memories.

Since Magnus was born things have been much simpler.  Easier somehow.  I feel confidence in my role as a mother.  I don’t have Amazon book orders on standby in my checkout basket.  I let him sleep on me all day every day, or beside me if he so wishes….except at night when he likes to sleep in his own bed.  I don’t have the breathing monitor on at all, I don’t stress if he fusses and grunts, or sneezes or hasn’t pooped in 5 hours.  I just live and enjoy.  I think that along with confidence in myself as a mother, raising Johannes taught me how quickly the time goes.  That bad times WILL fade and they will be replaced with happy memories.  So I don’t sweat the small stuff.  And you know what?  I don’t think I am screwing it up.  In his short little 6 weeks of life, Magnus is such a happy guy.  He’s sweet and calm and I couldn’t have asked for a better fit with our family.  His new smile is infectious and I cannot wait to snuggle him in the mornings, while Johannes and Minggis the cat sit with us on the nursery bench.  I think I’m happier too.

And p.s.  don’t you just love kissing newborn squishy faces and that wrinkly bit of head scalp?!  ahhhhh its my favorite thing ever along with the baby smell, but I can’t smell Magnus.  As Johannes likes to tell me all the time, “mom you smell like Magnus”.  I guess I can’t smell myself.