Over the last few months I learned a valuable lesson on motherhood. We are our children’s biggest advocate for everything from health, to education, to daily tasks. The world is a maze, specialists are busy, we have to be our children’s voice and in some cases we have to fight their battles.
Sometimes the answers are not clear. When our children get sick and diagnosis is not immediately determined, we have to fight our way through it. Its hard. Its exhausting. Frustrating, sometimes hopeless and often lonely.
That is why it is so important to reach out to friends and family. To share the experience and lean on them for comfort. To be the best advocates for our children, we have to be present.
Advocacy for our children was never so apparent to me as it is now. Johannes’ fevers are not something that can be fixed, and the course of treatment is blurry and practically non existent. I’ve created my own formula of vitamins, oils and minerals that seem to have worked. But its not enough. The fever will come back.
We visited Sick Kids hospital this week and sought help from a specialist. We now have a really important decision to make. Do we throw a last ditch effort and schedule Johannes’ tonsilectomy, or do we keep doing what we are doing. Neither option has guaranteed results, and both options have potential for scary consequences. How do we make this decision? How do I as a mother say “ok” to a surgery? How do I weight the risks against the benefits and come out feeling satisfied in my decision? For this last part I don’t have an answer. I hope and pray that in the next little while I will have some clarity. The weight of this decision is heavy at times so I’m trying my very very best to focus on the positive and keep enjoying the little things.